The "Hows" & "Whys"

How is it that Husband#1 is allowed to live beyond his means (in a house that he couldn't afford when we were married - that he also was supposed to either sell or refinance within two years of our divorce in '06/'07), taking care of his second wife and stepson... but he can't pay his measly $300 child support he fought so hard to eradicate for our two kids?

- and I use "our" loosely -

And why can't anyone at DHS do anything about it when he gets behind? I never received child support for September, and when I call to get help from them, what do they tell me? "We don't view it as a missed month. It goes in his arrears."

So..... I'm just out that money, and there are no consequences for him?? - or at least the "consequences" don't kick in until he is $2,000 or so behind.

WTH?!.

It will take half a year (plus) for him to get that far behind, with only $300/month for two children as his child support.

I know I don't have it as bad off as some.

It could always be worse. [knock on wood]

And I am grateful for everything I have.

But it's just not fair.

I requested that the amount be reviewed.... And of course he up and quits his job as soon as DHS sends him a letter notifying him it's going to happen.

WTH?!.

They basically handed him a "get out of child support" card.

Not that it matters... My case is in line to be reviewed at some unknown time in the future.

I can't afford to take him back to court on my own, and no one at DHS can tell me anything.

This just sucks.

How can someone have no conscience?

How can a man just not care about his children?

Why do men look at it like they are doing their ex / the woman a "favor" by helping support their own kids?

How can a man be okay with seeing his children four days a month (if even that sometimes)?

There are so many questions I have; so many "Hows" and "Whys" I just can't comprehend. And complaining how unfair it is isn't going to solve anything... I realize this. But I don't know what will either.

I guess this is part of my karma - just something I'm meant to go through in this life.